Say a prayer for all our shrubbery

By Staff
Leada DeVaney, Editor
It's been an interesting week since Greg and I bought the house that we will live in following the September wedding.
I use the term "interesting" to mean stressful. And exciting – all wrapped up into one.
The main thing I've learned through this process is men and women really are from different planets. The male planet is called "Pruning" and the female planet is called "Paint." Let me explain.
Greg's main concern about the new house is the shrubbery outside.
"Those shrubs on either side of the front steps are too tall," he said just seconds after we bought the house. "I'm going to trim them back."
At the time, I didn't think much about that statement. It wasn't until I looked out the dining room window to see leaves and limbs flying that I became alarmed.
It turns out trimmed meant cut down to the nub. And it wasn't just the shrubs on either side of the front steps. The two small trees on the corners of the house were reduced to mere twigs.
I tried not to look. After all, the agreement was I would take care of the inside of the house and Greg would deal with the outside. Technically speaking, those now nubby shrubs are in his domain.
I had more important things to worry about, namely, what color I wanted I wanted on the bedroom walls.
Shortly after razing all the shrubs in the yard, Greg wandered into the master bedroom, only to find me staring at the walls.
"What about taupe? Or a coffee color?," I asked Greg. "I was thinking about a mossy green, but I think that will be too dark."
"What about white?" he asked. "Off-white. Egg shell. Beige."
"Yuck," I replied. "Those are boring. I was thinking about a chambray color on the wall, with lighter blue shades on the tray ceiling."
"First of all, I don't even know what color chambray is," he replied. "You've got to stop watching 'Trading Spaces.' I know the inside of the house is yours, but I'm going to put my foot down if you start gluing hay to the walls."
I ignored him. If he can chop down the shrubs, I can paint the walls Easter egg blue.
Later that evening, Greg and I went to a home improvement store in search of all those things you need when you purchase a house.
He headed off in the direction of the lawn mowers, showing me the latest in yard improvement equipment. I drug him over to the paint counter, comparing blues and reds, browns and pinks.
It's true – men are from Mars and women are from Venus. And, apparently, there are no shrubs on Mars and Venus gets repainted every day.
I heard blue is popular there this year.

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